Doug gives 7 reasons why men should get married by 23. Here’s a summary for those who have a tough time reading his posts.
- God has created most people fundamentally incapable of being alone.(Get married because you’re actually a loser!)
- Gettin’ busy is better than getting clicky. (Porn is bad and sex fixes porn!)
- 23 years old is the oldest a man should be without acquiring a mother substitute. (This time with extra benefits!)
- If you have no personality, marriage will make you appear as if you have one! (You’re actually a loser, and people will all *know* unless you get married!)
- God wants babies – you need to be able to catch babies – therefore… 23! (If God had put you on this earth for your wisdom, he’d have made you a pastor. Be fruitful and obedient sheepies!)
- When you get older, you learn more about yourself and what you want and need, so it’s better to get married before you have any clue! (Create a small, reasonable checklist that includes working reproductive organs and theological sameness!)
- Put a dent in the menacing spectre of feminism by capturing a woman young and taking care of her so well she can’t even think about autonomy! (Shit, I needed seven points and I’ve only got six – bash feminism, that’s always a hit!)
To be totally fair, the last point hasn’t got a damn thing to do with getting married early. I suspect that Doug just wanted to see if he could use the sentence “Feminism is a toxic mess.” into an article because he thought it sounded cool.